So you need to disappear. Maybe the Monday morning gridlock’s finally ground you down, maybe Interpol are on your tail – we won’t ask too many questions. Point is, you need a hotel that’s hard to reach, but well worth the long-haul once you do. From Antipodean adventures to zen-like ryokans, get off-grid with our checklist of the most remote luxury hotels the world has to offer.
FOGO ISLAND INN
Canada
To the uninitiated, Newfoundland’s icy winters and edge-of-the-Atlantic winds might hint at inhospitality. But the welcome ‘come from aways’ received round here is world famous, and nowhere is it stronger than at Fogo Island Inn, a forward-looking luxury stay with its foundations firmly in one of the island’s traditional fishing communities. A stilt-balanced beacon against the craggy coast, the hotel melds modern design with local handicrafts and heaps of bonhomie – you’d be hard-pressed to find more hygge this side of Scandinavia.
Fend off the warm fuzzies with a frosty coastal hike, village-hopping bike ride or a puffin-accompanied picnic. When you return, you’ll be brought back into the fold with fresh-caught seafood and foraged delicacies at the wave-buffeted restaurant. And if the cold sets in, simply sink into a roof-top hot tub (the hotel’s signature Canadian whiskey cocktail in hand, for serious defrosting). Just when you think you can’t get any cosier – snuggled under your patchwork quilt, toes toasting over the wood-fired stove – the thought may occur to you that you never want to venture out again. The wall-to-wall views will coax you out eventually, but come morning, a pre-breakfast tray of pastries and coffee will arrive at your door, so your hibernation can continue a little longer at least…
AWASI PATAGONIA
Chile
For isolation with a side of serious eye candy, look no further (although that’s already pretty far) than Awasi Patagonia. On the edge of Chile’s Torres del Paine National Park, the lodge has not-another-soul-in-sight views of soaring mountains, golden grasslands and the park’s namesake granite towers. Each of the 14 luxury cabins have floor-to-ceiling windows, so you’re guaranteed holiday snaps worthy of a Nat Geo centrefold. Plus you’ll have a private alfresco hot tub, if you feel like getting truly up close and personal with the pampas. And when you’re ready to strike out into Chile’s gaucho-populated wild, wild south, you’ll team up with your personal guide (and then pile into your private four-wheel drive) to start your torres-conquering, glacier-traversing, Lake Pehoe-skimming agenda.
Dinner is a relaxed affair (phew!) of local specialties and hotel-grown produce – though panoramic views provide plenty of drama to see you through to pudding. Back in your cabin, bring the tempo down even further with a massage or a mixologist-crafted nightcap. Need anything else? Just walkie-talkie down to reception; your wish will be their command before you can say 10-4.
MAHU WHENUA
New Zealand
Mahu Whenua makes no bones about its mission statement – the hotel’s name is M?ori for ‘healing the land’. Lucky for you, guests are as well looked after as the landscape at this luxury homestead in the centre of the South Island’s high country. Vast views of Middle-Earthen mountains might inspire veneration, but inside the lodge it’s an easy, make-yourself-at-home affair. Meals can be taken out on the terrace or squirrelled away in your suite, and instead of a formal bar, fine Otago wines are served on a whenever-you-fancy basis.
Now boot up and bring the binoculars – you’ve got 200 square miles of private eco-sanctuary to explore. Weave your way around Lake Wanaka’s hiking trails (or wave to it from a helicopter tour), set out on a bird of paradise-spotting safari and stop off at a Manuka farm for a honey sampling. Still got some beans? The hotel has mountain bikes and a stable of trusty steeds, too. Out here in the heart-pattering high country, the hotel’s careful stewardship ensures nature is healing – after a few day’s restorative roaming, you’ll find that rings true in more ways than one.
ZABORIN
Japan
Soaking in the scenery takes on new meaning at Zaborin, a modern ryokan in Hokkaido built around volcanic onsen hot springs. Here, you’ll be immersed in the thousand-year-old tradition of healing hot-spring bathing – literally, as each of the 15 villas has two private onsen baths, one indoor and one outdoor. Traditional wisdom is that the spring water soothes the skin, boosts the metabolism and banishes aches – handy after a day spent hiking forest trails or hitting the slopes at Niseko, one of Japan’s finest ski resorts.
Minimalist interiors set a meditative tone, with window walls revealing vistas of woodland, meadows and Mount Yoti, all snow-blanketed for six months of the year – when the mindfulness apps won’t cut it, hotfoot it here. Opportunities to further steep yourself in Japan’s ancient culture include traditional tea ceremonies, sake tastings and matcha masterclasses. Come evening, flock to the restaurant for a final restorative ritual – an 11-course kita kaiseki meal, featuring ingredients fished and foraged by the chef himself.
ANANTARA AL JABAL AL AKHDAR
Oman
Peak seclusion is the name of the game at Oman‘s Anantara Al Jabal Al Akhdar. A knee-wobbling 2,000 metres above sea level and two hours from Muscat, the plateau-crowning resort is ringed by rugged mountains and accessible only by chopper or (chic, chauffeur-driven) four-wheel drive. Make it here, and the cosseting reaches new heights. There’s a hammam-like spa and a heated infinity pool, plus three restaurants serving a range of fine dining and traditional local fare (although staff can set up a table on any canyon-view outcrop that takes your fancy).
The hotel’s mountain gurus will guide you through local villages, and brave souls can take on the canyon via the vertiginous via ferrata. Telescopes are set out for stargazing, and come sundown, the hotel’s lantern-lit tower and courtyard come alive as the shisha lounge and cocktail bar kick into action – so book the babysitter and stay up way past your bedtime.
MONA PAVILIONS
Tasmania
Slick, stylish and a smidge provocative – it may be a bit of a trek to Tasmania, but Mona Pavilions is about as far from the boonies as you can get. Just outside Hobart, this boutique riverfront hotel is part of the Museum of Old and New Art. With a punchy mix of rare antiquities and modern Australian art, the huge private collection pulls Melbourne’s culture-vulture crowd all the way out here, no problem. No biggie, but its impact has been compared to the Guggenheim; stay at Mona Pavilions and it’s yours to peruse at your leisure.
The hotel itself is just as striking, with eight contemporary suites cantilevering over the Derwent river. Each is decked out with original art and bespoke furnishings by Tasmanian talent, plus a curation of the staff’s high-brow reading recs, so you’ll be absorbing Aussie culture by osmosis even if you never budge from your private terrace. Art-filled days can be punctuated with river cruises or wine tastings (the hotel has its own label), though, as the in-room compendium promises, staff can arrange ‘pretty much anything legal.’ Big talk, indeed; but then again, bold strokes are what Mona does best.
ORIGINS LODGE
Costa Rica
Succumb to the come-hither call of the wild at Origins Lodge, a green-as-can-be retreat high in Costa Rica’s rainforest-clad mountains. Up in the cloud-shrouded canopy, seven wooden roundhouse suites cinematic jungle vistas, plus the natural surround-sound of howler monkeys, jaguar roars and gently rustling foliage.
Intrepid travellers will be lured into the wilderness by biodiversity hikes, horse-riding expeditions, waterfall treks and night-time nature walks. But at Origins Lodge, breaking a sweat is entirely optional. Lap up Lake Nicaragua views without stirring from the natural infinity pool, then settle in at the spa, where millennia-tested treatments put volcanic stones, bamboo and the hotel’s own organic herbs to healing use. Fish from the estate’s lagoons, veg from the organic garden and dairy courtesy of Margaret the much-loved cow are the restaurant’s bread and (home-churned) butter. But bucolic doesn’t equal country bumpkin – visiting chefs, each chosen by Michelin-starred Jean-Luc L’Hourre, take charge of the French-inspired dinner menu. And if all that’s not wholesome enough, the hotel is B Corp-certified, so your eco-conscience can breathe easy.
Seeking somewhere sizzling this Jan/Feb? Take a peak at our hotlist of where to head for winter sun…